Tag Archives: books

Where Were You When the Mall Shut Down?

1 Sep

Aug 27, 2026

For thirty-two years, I lived behind Lloyd Center, a mall that at one point was cited as the largest shopping mall in the world. For many people in the larger Portland area, Lloyd Center was considered iconic for its ice rink as well as its size. Living as close as I did, I visited the mall thousands of times, and no, that’s not an exaggeration. During heat waves or cold snaps, the mall would be an air-conditioned or warm haven for walking when the weather was uncooperative. I spent countless hours at Barnes & Noble reading and people watching. I’d talk to the clerks at GameStop and Electronics Boutique about the latest upcoming games. And although I’d only skated on the ice rink once or twice, I’d watch from the balconies as amateur and professional skaters practiced their techniques or as the younger set learned how to skate for the very first time.

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On August 8, 2026, Lloyd Center closed for the last time. Long before then, the mall had become its own version of a ghost town. The vast majority of shops had been abandoned, the major retailers having fled years before. The hardest part for me was watching Barnes & Noble shut down in early May. The bookstore had originally opened on 12th and Broadway in 2002, eventually moving inside the mall to become one of Lloyd Center’s major tenants. Losing Barnes & Noble meant essentially that the mall was beyond recovery, and indeed that was the case. Once a mall loses all of its anchor stores, it’s very hard to bring customers back in.

And indeed, many stores had already shut down. Well before Lloyd Center’s closure, I’d watched as Macy’s, Sears, Nordstrom, as well as smaller stores like Marshall’s and Ross all left the mall. The pandemic certainly hadn’t helped, and of course the rise of online shopping and the continuing spread of AI meant that many people didn’t need to go to a mall nearly as often. By the time Barnes & Noble was slated to close, the mall’s demise seemed all but certain.

Then the last day came. On Saturday, August 8, the crowds surged into the mall. To say there was a mismatch between the huge throngs versus the small number of stores that remained open was a colossal understatement. Thousands of people passed through Lloyd Center to pay their respects, to skate on the ice rink one last time, and to take pictures of what would soon be demolished. I came for about an hour on Saturday, grateful to see the crowds, but one of my first thoughts was: Where were you? If you truly loved Lloyd Center, why weren’t you here supporting the remaining stores that struggled to find customers? Why did it take Lloyd Center closing for you to visit one last time? And why is it that the one time the mall was truly full for the first time in many years was when we had to say goodbye to it?

I’m fully aware that there were numerous attempts to save the mall and its iconic ice rink. I know community members, merchants, and ice skaters went to Portland’s city council in order to find ways to preserve Lloyd Center, and I thank each and every one of you who did so. At the same time, if you need to preserve something, you need to be there to support it continuously, not just wait until the writing is on the wall that something is about to change.

And here’s the thing: For those of us who live right by the mall or have worked there for many years, losing Lloyd Center isn’t simply suffering the loss of an iconic institution. It’s an inevitable and tangible reality. Many of us never wanted to see Lloyd Center closed, let alone demolished, for the simple reason that when that happens, we have a ringside seat to its destruction. I have no doubt that the plans for the renovation of the Lloyd Center neighborhood will eventually lead to something wonderful, but in the meantime, no one looks forward to the bombardment of noise and construction that will commence and continue for the next few years. It’s hard enough for those people who lost their jobs at Lloyd Center or had to relocate elsewhere to find work. It’s even harder when you’re watching the neighborhood lose a part of its soul.

I will remember Lloyd Center for the joy it brought me and countless others who wandered through its corridors and visited its stores. I’ll remember the Christmas lights and decorations as well as the many shoppers who filled the mall during the holidays, even if Lloyd Center slowed down at other times of the year. And I’ll remember moving into the neighborhood in 1994 and realizing I’d found a great place to live as the mall and surrounding neighborhood offered so many opportunities to shop, mingle, and be entertained. My main hope is that whatever is built in place of Lloyd Center will retain at least some of the spirit of the mall, whether it be a new ice rink or a memorial of some kind to commemorate what we’ve lost. Above all, it would be nice to have a place to gather and congregate freely. Even if hanging at the mall is no longer a cultural touchstone like it once was, the importance of having a neighborhood social hub cannot be overstated. May the next iteration of Lloyd Center, or whatever replaces it, turn out to be something we can all be proud of.

Bookstores in my Backyard

29 Jul

After 24 years in the Lloyd Center area, Barnes & Noble closed its doors in May 2026. I have rather mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I absolutely loved having a large bookstore only a couple of blocks from me. I enjoyed going over and reading a good book or magazine whenever I wanted. However, Lloyd Center has been, to put it politely, going through a few changes. We now know that Lloyd Center will close on August 8 to customers, with all remaining tenants to leave on August 30. Thus, it wasn’t a huge surprise to find out about Barnes & Noble’s closure. Frankly, it was one of the few reasons I even went to Lloyd Center any more.

To be blunt: It’s getting harder and harder to justify going shopping when you can order things from Amazon or other places. Bookstores are one of the few places I love to go to both for browsing and buying magazines and novels. As a writer, bookstores are my place of power, so it always hits hard when a store closes. Barnes & Noble originally opened where the Goodwill is now on 12th and Broadway and moved into the mall a few years later. I’ll miss it, but it also gives me an opportunity to check out other bookstores in the area that I haven’t gone to in years.

In my neighborhood alone, I have Broadway Books, which has been a staple in my immediate area for many years. In Downtown Portland there is the ubiquitous Powell’s City of Books. Powell’s, of course, has satellite stores in other areas including Hawthorne Boulevard, Cedar Hills Crossing in Beaverton, and a branch inside the Portland International Airport. Back on the east side, Future Dreams and Excalibur Comics have more than enough reasons to visit if you love comic books. Last but not least, Parallel Worlds Bookshop is Portland’s premiere science fiction and fantasy bookstore and outside of Powell’s Books has the largest selection of books in these genres.

In other words, there are options. And all of these places I’ve mentioned share one thing in common: They’re not national chains but rather local alternatives that in many cases offer broader selections than the corporate stores. And that’s rather important for a number of reasons. Supporting local bookstores means supporting people who might be experts in the fields that interest you. If you have a favorite topic or genre, it’s more than likely that the place you’re buying your books from has a person who’s also invested in that same subject and is more than willing to help you find what you’re looking for. That’s why those bookstores exist, after all. A satisfied customer keeps coming back for more, and that bookseller hopefully gets more positive word-of-mouth advertising from those customers.

The main thing that I loved about going to the Barnes & Noble in my neighborhood was that in some ways it felt more like a living room than a bookstore. It had a wonderful lived-in feeling where you could simply come in and browse to your heart’s content while snacking at the cafe or people watching as you read a periodical. Most of the independent bookstores may not have that luxury, but on the other hand, a neighborhood bookstore is where you get to know the people a little bit better. Yes, I’ll miss Lloyd Center and all its amenities. On the other hand, maybe it’s time to get out and enjoy some more of what the other neighborhoods have to offer, particularly if you’re a book lover.

Knowing When to Say No

20 Mar

At last, it’s come to this. I have so many video games at home, both physical copies as well as from the various libraries on my systems (Playstation Plus, Nintendo Online, and Game Pass) that I’ve decided to drastically cut down how much I spend on this hobby. I’d already reduced my budget for video games anyway for various reasons, but now that I have a huge backlog, I’m much more likely to simply finish up what’s there. In addition, any “new” games that I want to get can be downloaded from those libraries, meaning that I’ll only spend money on the games I want once every few months.

I’m actually overjoyed with this decision since it’s been obvious for a while that there’s no conceivable way to finish every game in my collection for at least a year unless I have more time freed up. Additionally, with the job hunting, finishing the test for my medical billing and coding certification, and other activities keeping me busy, that’s not going to happen anytime soon. So yes, having more money available due to less spending on my hobbies isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

I’m implementing a similar strategy on buying more books as my library has grown substantially, but my book space is at capacity. There’s only one book that I’m currently looking at buying, Ursula K. Le Guin’s The Books of Earthsea: The Complete Illustrated Edition, and it’s big enough that I’d have to clear out more space than I have now. Knowing when to say no to buying more things has been an essential lesson I’ve learned while being unemployed. I’m committed to being more frugal than ever for the next year, even when I eventually obtain a new job.

Revisiting Earthly Harmonies

11 Oct

In 2009 the Portland Gay Men’s Chorus performed “Earthly Harmonies,” a concert featuring a variety of pieces from different countries. This was one of my all-time favorite concerts, and I’d often wished we could perform some of those songs again. Thankfully, our holiday program, entitled “Merry Everything,” evokes the spirit of that concert in that we are singing winter songs from around the world. Furthermore, one of the songs from “Earthly Harmonies” makes a return appearance.

“Zikr,” composed by A.R. Rahman, wrote this piece of music for the soundtrack of the film Bose: The Forgotten Hero. In our first performance of this song, my fellow chorus member Vikram Srinivasan was our soloist. The current version that we’ll perform does not have the same solo part but is still stunning in its beauty. Thank you to A.R. Rahman for this wonderful masterpiece as well as our conductors, Dr. Braeden Ayres and Garrett Bond, for bringing it back for an encore performance. You may follow the link below to see our original performance of “Zikr.” I hope you enjoy it.

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=zikr+portland+gay+men%27s+chorus